So fast that we miss things. We miss connections, little moments, and epiphanies. The days speed by and we work tirelessly to keep up with the infinite number of things that lure our attention.

I’m definitely guilty of this. I often say that my mind is like a CNN screen – there’s stuff happening on the main screen (usually whatever is happening directly in front of me) but I’ve got the picture in picture in the top right hand of the screen (which is probably replaying something that happening earlier in the day/week) and the scroll bar at the bottom with things I need to remember and things that are coming up. I like to refer to it as organized chaos.

Now imagine coupling this brain activity with actual stuff happening outside of my body…like traffic, news, Twitter, and human conversations. Yeah…it gets intense.

And I’m not alone. You might have a brain that also feels like a Lady Gaga concert complete with noise, lights, smoke machines, deafening bass, and meat dresses. I understand your struggle.

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately because I resolved to return to my daily meditation routine following my birthday a few weeks back. I’m happy to report that I’ve been consistent, and it’s made a huge difference in my mental state and mood. There’s a level of clarity and calm that I haven’t experienced since…the last time I meditated regularly.

A few years back, I read John C. Maxwell’s book, Thinking for a Change. The book provides a blueprint for fully maximizing your mind’s potential. Maxwell suggests that we need to spend more time thinking. Yes, thinking. As simple as that sounds, most of us don’t think enough. I mean, we think about things when we have to – what we’ll wear in the morning, what freeway to take to work, what we want for dinner, what flavor fruit snack to eat (maybe the fruit snack part is just me).

But we’re not thinking about LIFE. We spend a lot of time thinking about the little things that comprise the mosaic of our day but what about the BIG things that, when accumulated, make all the difference in who we become and what our lives mean? How does one even begin a thinking regimen that’s sustainable?

Well, it starts with asking yourself some key questions on a consistent basis. I prefer to do this “inner work” on Sundays because that happens to me when my mind and spirit are most settled and receptive. You can do it whenever it feels right.

I start with a blank sheet of paper, a pen, and a calm mind.

Here it is – Lisa Nicole Bell’s Recipe for BRAIN ZEN:

1. Find a quiet place to sit and take 2-3 deep breaths.

2. Close your eyes and take 3-4 more deep, cleansing breaths in through your nose, out through your mouth.

3. Sit still and quiet for a few minutes, breathing at a comfortable pace.

4. As thoughts pop up, imagine yourself gently picking them up and moving them out of your mind’s eye. Remain calm and continue to breathe cleansing breaths.

5. Sit in quiet stillness until you feel your mind has settled. (Getting to a quiet mind gets easier over time – stick with it!)

6. Open your eyes and answer these questions on paper (the on paper part is important – don’t skip it!)

• What are my 3 most important values in life? (If you’ve already answered these in your personal work then just restate them)
• What are my top 5 goals?
• What actions did I take last week to move me closer to my goals?
• What areas in my life present opportunities for improvement?
• How can I take bigger, more powerful actions toward my goals this week?
• What am I most happy about and most proud of right now?

7. After answering the questions, put your pen and paper aside and close your eyes again. Breathe deep cleansing breaths and return to stillness and quiet.

8. Envision yourself going through the week – see yourself at work, at events, in meetings, carrying out activities of the day. See yourself feeling and being your values. Allow yourself to feel what your mind feels in that moment.

Now gently open your eyes and take a deep cleansing breath. Before returning to your life, seal the intention you’ve set with a prayer to your Higher Power, sending gratitude for what has been and what is to come.

9. Review your answers to the question. THINK about each one. Are your values showing up in your daily life? What things need to change in order for you to move closer to the life you envision? Take a minute to schedule activities for the week that will move you forward in major ways.

Now, we celebrate! Yay you! You did it! (This is the part where you do your happy dance – the Tootsie Roll, the 2 step, the Wop, the Charlie Brown, the Dougie, whatever your thing is, this is where you hit it.)

The cool thing about this Brain Zen process is that you can do it anytime almost anywhere. It’s a great centering exercise when things get crazy and you start to feel out of sorts.

Let me know how Brain Zen works for you or if you observe anything new and interesting as a result of your thinking and meditation.

Until next time, may a calm and clear mind be yours!

The post Lisa’s Recipe for Brain Zen appeared first on Lisa Nicole Bell.

Leverage your existing network.

Networking is probably the single most important activity any entrepreneur or professional needs to do. When I think about various sectors, jobs, clients, and opportunities, it all goes back to who you know and who knows you. Because of that, I constantly advise people who want to accelerate their growth to turn to their connections and think differently about them.

Today I’m issuing a challenge to you.

Set aside time to make a list of 5 of the most successful and connected people you know. Then begin going down the list and reach out to them to find out what they’re up to. At the end of the call or meeting, tell them about one specific thing you’re working on and ask them to introduce you to 1 or 2 people who could help you achieve that goal.

Connected, successful people tend to hang out with their kind so if you find one, you’re very likely to find more in their network. If you have a good reason for wanting a connection, most connectors are happy to make the introduction.

Think about this: The next five years of your business and life will largely be determined by 3 things:
1. What you learn
2. The choices you make
3. The people you meet

The objective is to manipulate each of these factors in your favor as much as possible. Where networking is concerned, the easiest way to do this is to make relationship-building a top 3 priority.

The post Lisa’s 1 Degree Networking Challenge appeared first on Lisa Nicole Bell.

Without further ado and in no particular order…

1. Self-fulfillment and happiness depends on the triple alignment of personal values, natural talents, and goals.
This is perhaps the most profound thing we’re put on the planet to sort out – how do we align these three huge things into something that makes sense and works? I’ve personally seen so many people do really well in one of these areas while the others spiraled out of control. It’s not easy to live a life that reflects values, talents, and goals, but, as someone who has eased into that sweet spot, I can tell you that it’s worth it. Have you ever contemplated this alignment for yourself? Think about it – when you are working in harmony with all the things you believe and possess naturally, achievement and joy are so much easier to experience.

2. Your work is a divine assignment. Treat it as such.
It’s easy to feel like our work is how we make money rather than a deeply meaningful and spiritual pursuit. This is especially true if we’re engaged in work that isn’t our calling. But here’s the deal: your work is your choice. Even if you think you’re stuck. I know it’s easy to think that you’re “waiting” on the right time, opportunity, or threshold, but at the core of it, you are in control of your life. Your life as you know it is the product of many choices, large and small, that you make. So, your work – the work you’ve been put on the planet to do-  is a divine calling. It deserves your respect, your time, your attention, and your protection. On the journey to your destiny, there will be people who don’t understand your vision and those who want to destruct it. It’s your job to view your work as a critical pursuit divinely planted in your soul.

3. Self-care is the most generous gift you can give to your loved ones.
I used to be one of those people who would give of myself until I was depleted. I saw this as “generous” and frequently patted myself on the back meanwhile playing the victim for being so used up. I couldn’t understand how me giving until it hurt wasn’t yielding amazing relationships. Then it occurred to me: if I’m not happy and healthy, it’s nearly impossible to fully experience the layers of good in a healthy relationship. On top of that, I can’t contribute positively to a situation when I’m constantly trying to catch up from overgiving. Everyone is better off when I make me a top priority. That includes mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual well-being. And so it is with you. You can only serve from a full vessel. Fill yourself daily and serve from the overflow.

4. Working with the flow of life instead of insisting on other circumstances is how we achieve personal peace.
Life works when we let it. It’s so easy to drift into wanting things to be other than they are. But the most amazing things happen when we’re in flow – the opportunities come, the connections are made, the resources show up. It’s not necessary to work so hard against life’s flow insisting on our way. Work with the current and let life be as easy as it can be.

These reflections have subtly shifted my daily experience of life. It’s a new way of thinking and being  - hopefully something here has inspired you to a happier, healthier place.

The post A Year Older, A Year Wiser appeared first on Lisa Nicole Bell.

And then there comes the obstacles – the things that cause you to question why you started a business in the first place. It’s on those days that you miss the security of the 9-5 predictability and envy people who don’t have the responsibilities you have. But at your core, you know that your worst day doing work you love is still better than your best day building someone else’s dream.

With that in mind, I encourage you to think deeply this week about legacy. Generally we start to contemplate what we’ll leave behind and how people will remember us when we think about how our businesses will be after we’re gone. The interesting paradox of legacy is that it’s an immensely profound concept but it’s created and molded in the smallest moments and simplest transactions. It’s not the big days where something noteworthy happens – it’s the mornings when you get up earlier to make time for exercise or the days when you give your team time off because you know they need it.

Legacy is not the billion dollar exit, the massive publicly traded company, or the luxurious lifestyle. It’s the people you touch, the lessons you teach, and the life you experience. Your motivation for building an incredible business must be tied to impact because that’s the only way to have meaningful context around the hustle. Money, while important, doesn’t imbue our grind with meaning. Only we can do that. It requires a willingness to bet everything you have and everything you are on what you say you believe.

So, what kind of legacy are you building? What are your values? How do your values show up in the way you conduct yourself as a business person? As lofty as it sounds, it’s possible for things like passion, integrity, love, and joy to be mainstays in your operation. The people and processes around you reflect these values because the way you spend your money and time are direct reflections of what you value.

Even if it’s just journaling about this for a few minutes or finding a way to be more present in your work, consider your legacy. Don’t let your legacy be an accident. Remember that your life (and your work) are love letters you write to the world.

The post Thoughts on Legacy Building for Entrepreneurs appeared first on Lisa Nicole Bell.

It starts with understanding the dynamics of human relationships and how they’re initiated. Frankly, it requires that you become humble enough to value listening more than talking. People love to talk about themselves and the more opportunities you create to listen, the more empowered you’ll be to shine in meaningful ways at the right time.

1. Be more interested, than interesting.

Make it a priority to be more interested in other people than you are in showcasing how interesting you are. If you spend more than half of a conversation talking about yourself, you probably haven’t done much to genuinely connect with the other person. Make it a point to…

2. Ask questions.

About the other person. About their interests. About their opinions on recent news. About what inspires them. Ask at least 2 thoughtful questions and you’ll consistently be perceived as a smart and fun conversationalist. Listen closely to the answers and allow them to guide the conversation.

3. Be the most fabulous, engaging version of yourself possible.

Without getting veneer and phony, stretch beyond your normal way of being into the most extroverted version of you that exists. Many times what feels like a stretch just makes us seem more open and friendly which is exactly what you’re going for.

4. Put the phone away.

I get it – in those awkward moments next to the punch bowl, you want to whip out your phone and scroll for your life. But remember that your phone is alienating to people who want to say hello and connect with you. They really can’t tell whether you’re playing Angry Birds or reading an important business email. Even if you have to endure an awkward lull between conversations, keep the phone stored.

5. Work on your storytelling skills.

Have you ever been to a party where a bunch of people were all gathered around one person who had everyone captivated? I can almost guarantee that the person in question was doing a great job of telling an engaging story. Here’s a simple trick: Instead of stringing together a series of events, tell them in a story. Add context – what was the atmosphere like? How did you (and others involved) feel? What was the response to the event? How did it inform the present?

Two people can present the exact same of facts and one can sound like an epic adventure while the other sounds like a bore. If you’re not that great at telling stories, check out a few books on presenting (Presentation Secrets of Steve Jobs is a great one). The storytelling skill will serve you in many ways.

Use these 5 tips at your next event and be the most interesting person in the room.

The post How to Be the Most Interesting Person in the Room appeared first on Lisa Nicole Bell.

There’s a dangerous epidemic happening in communities across the country. Perhaps you or someone you know has been affected. It doesn’t discriminate – it affects people of all races and regions. When faced with this terrible dilemma, many succumb to the pressure and find themselves nursing feelings of resentment and regret. But it doesn’t have to be this way. I’m here to show you a better way.

This epidemic is picked brain syndrome. It plagues those who allow people to pick their brains in exchange for inequitable compensation such as coffee, lunch, or “referrals.” It starts with a seemingly harmless invitation to talk, but it suddenly takes on an ominous aura when you hear those dreaded 5 words: “Can I pick your brain?”

You instantly feel it – that sinking feeling in your stomach, that mild throb in your frontal lobe, that impulse to go play in traffic. You suddenly want to slam your computer closed and pretend you never saw the request.

The question is awkward because on one hand, you genuinely want to help people, and you probably know what it’s like to be new at something and need some direction. On the other hand, your to do list multiplies like bacteria in a warm, moist environment and you become mildly annoyed with people who announce Inbox Zero status because you’ve never been able to get under 33 emails in your inbox. So, you feel bad. Maybe you avoid responding to the message or you write back with some lame excuse for why you can’t.

Listen, there’s hope. I know it seems impossible to slay this persistent dragon, but I and many others before me have discovered tried and true ways to ward off picked brain syndrome.

Before I share remedies, let’s first explore the indications that your brain has been picked:

• Anxiety over sharing hard-won lessons in life and business
• A feeling of emptiness from a lack of thank yous and gratitude
• Mental fatigue from solving others’ problems
• A bank account that holds steady while the clock ticks away
• Weight gain from attending excessive lunch and coffee meetings
• Dry mouth from talking during so many meetings

If you found yourself nodding furiously as you read through the symptoms, keep reading to learn how you can end picked brain syndrome once and for all.

1. Know that you don’t have to say yes to every coffee or lunch invitation.

At some point, aspiring entrepreneurs and professionals were told that the appropriate way to connect with a mentor or potential partner was to ask to pick their brain. You and I know this is not true. Even if you have the best of intentions, you simply don’t have the time or bandwidth to honor all of these requests, and this is even more true if you’re very successful. The first step in vaccinating yourself from picked brain syndrome is understanding that you don’t have to say yes to every invitation…and you don’t have to feel guilty about saying no.

2. There’s a way to meet the need without catching the disease.

In many cases, we start to feel like giving advice is a zero sum game: it’s either give up an hour of your time and years of lessons learned or say no and alienate a potential connection. There’s a middle ground.

Consider the many other ways you can be helpful:

Recommending books to move the person along their journey

Suggesting a call as an alternative to a meeting

Inviting the person to hear you speak or see you at an event

Extending the option for them to email their questions to you

Referring them to someone else who may be a better fit or have more time

Sending links to articles you’ve written or read that could be helpful

These are all ways to say yes without opening yourself up to catching picked brain syndrome. I love to help people (I mean, REALLY love to help people – my whole career is built on the idea of impacting lives positively) but as my career has evolved and my businesses have grown, I’ve had to accept the limits on my time and mental energy. As such, I’ve had to adopt a variety of alternatives to brain picking like the lightning round.

3. Become a master of the lightning round.

When some people come to you for advice, they feel a need to tell you their whole life story and the epic tale of how they became the superhero they are today. No matter how interesting the story, you simply won’t have time to hear all of these stories. If you’re going to agree to giving feedback or advice, you need to master the 15 minute call. Manage expectations by establishing time limitations at the top of the call. Example: “Hey Jan, I’m excited to connect. I’ve got about 15 minutes before my next appointment so let’s dive right in.” This lets Jan know that she needs to get to the point and get as much valuable information as she can during that window of time.

So there you have it – specific strategies for avoiding picked brain syndrome. The information and expertise you’ve developed throughout your career is immensely valuable. Sharing is a good thing. Sharing knowledge is how we achieve immortality. Be open to connections and new relationships, but be mindful of how contagious picked brain syndrome is.

Go forth and guard your unpicked brain. Good luck and Godspeed.

PS If you’re a person who is asking about picking someone’s brain, there’s hope for you too. Read this. No matter what, never ask to pick someone’s brain. Just don’t.

The post What to Say When Someone Asks to Pick Your Brain appeared first on Lisa Nicole Bell.

It’s the ruts that we slip into when time is zooming by.

I heard a great quote the other day: A rut is just a grave with both ends knocked out. When we’re stuck in ruts, we’re repeating the same behaviors without questioning whether they serve us. We give ourselves over to the grind of life and cross our fingers hoping it all leads somewhere.

An inspired life requires consciousness – it requires that we are awake to what’s happening in our lives. It requires that we be intentional about what we’re creating in every aspect of our existence. Our lives are the love letters we write to the world. In the most spiritual sense, the way we choose to live is how we demonstrate gratitude to our Higher Power for the grace and genius that is a life well lived.

So, here are my questions to help you pull yourself out of any ruts you may be in. I revisit these questions at least once a quarter, and they never fail to illuminate areas that deserve my attention and creativity. Ask yourself these questions:

1. What is not working in my life right now? In what area(s) am I dissatisfied?

Sometimes it’s easier to be clear about what we don’t want than what we do want. When that happens, this question helps us center on the problem and frame it up correctly so we can quickly and easily find solutions.

2. What would a more happy, desirable existence in these areas look like?

Following the thought strand from question 1, let’s say your relationship isn’t working for you. The next question is about the specifics of reverse engineering what you want. You can’t be what you can’t see. You need a clear vision in your mind’s eye in order to stay motivated and take meaningful action.

3. What action am I willing to take to have what I say I want?

This is where the rubber meets the road. It’s easy to daydream about the possibilities, but the process of overcoming mind chatter and taking action is what really makes the difference. I recommend starting small. Take one simple action every day that moves you closer to the ideal. Acknowledge your progress and keep moving forward.

4. If I took consistent action in this area of my life, how different would I be/look/act/feel in 10 days, 10 weeks, 10 months, 10 years?

This question really pulls back the lens so you can see the broader implications of what simple lifestyle choices mean for your legacy. When motivation lags, it’s this clear understanding of where our choices can take us that helps keep us accountable for following through.

So, you may find that you need additional information or resources to help you out of your rut – find them. In the words of Eli Broad, your work is not your life, but your life is your work. Approach life with intention and care. You deserve the very best your imagination and action can create.

The post Stuck in a rut? These 4 Questions Will Pull You Out appeared first on Lisa Nicole Bell.

WORK

So, I’m in the process of starting a new division of Inspired Life Media Group. The pieces are coming together nicely, and I’m contemplating bringing on a cofounder to handle operations and business affairs. Regardless, I’m pleased with the traction thus far and excited to reveal it to the world in Q2.

I’ve also created a venture with a friend and business partner who is simply brilliant. He and I have crafted a methodology for something that many have tried to do unsuccessfully before us. Fortunately, we have created a repeatable process that is proving to be profitable and impactful. I love it.

SPEAKING

I spoke at SXSW last month and at Google this month. Video on the latter will be up soon.

PRESS

I was featured on Madame Noire earlier this month sharing my reflections on entrepreneurship.

TRAVEL

Next up is NYC and Huntsville. I’ll be in NYC for part of upfronts, several meetings, and hosting an event (more on that soon). I’ll be in Huntsville seeing family and taking some much needed decompress time.

MIND FOOD

I finished reading Eli Broad’s The Art of Being Unreasonable. Fabulous book – Eli is an amazing man who used simple, timeless principles to create billion dollar publicly traded companies. Inspiring to say the least. Now I’m reading a book on venture capital, a book on storytelling, and the assigned reading for a class I’m taking. Yes, I’m a complete blerd.

RANDOM

I wrote about Lush’s awesomeness not long ago. I was fortunate to receive a fabulous package after that with some of my favorite products and a few I hadn’t tried. In short, Lush is just amazing. I LOVE the Buffy Bar (I can shower, use it and not need lotion after – which is amazing for a black person!). I also got their Ocean Salt scrub which is lovely. To be well-branded and offer great products, this is the brilliance of a great business.

PERSONAL

I’m in an optimistic place. I’m prone to brooding cynicism (hey, I’m an INTJ, what can I say…) but I’ve been in a good head and heart space. The recent string of wins certainly helps. My birthday is just over a month away, and I’m excited although I have no idea what I want to do to celebrate. Last year, I had an awesome party and a fabulous day. Maybe this year, I’ll escape to Vancouver to play or head to Hawaii for some fun on North Shore. We’ll see.

Until next time,

Lisa

The post Latest on Lisa – April/May appeared first on Lisa Nicole Bell.

My definition of success involves time freedom (for family, self, and adventure), a large collection of stilettos, creative freedom, profitability, and an endless supply of fruit snacks. Yours is probably quite different, and neither of us is wrong.

So imagine what happens when I indoctrinate you with my definition or when your mom/brother/dad/sister/cousin/friend/boss indoctrinates you with their definition. You get caught up pursuing goals that don’t really matter to you. You start adopting values that are meaningless to you. You experience internal conflict because you truly aspire to be, do, and have your own success rather than passively drifting toward some external definition.

In business and life, it’s important to know how you define success because if you don’t have a plan for your growth and success, you’re a part of someone else’s.

It’s easy to feel like our plans have to be “approved” by the people who matter most in our lives, but really, you’re the person who is most affected by the consequences of your choices. It really just comes down to identifying your values, setting your goals, and taking daily action to make them happen.

If I was to look at your calendar and bank statement today, would it be clear to me what your values are? Are your colleagues, friends, and team members clear about what’s most important to you?

Here’s the thing: The more specific and open you are about what your values are and what you want, the easier it is to get it. The “next level” doesn’t really exist except where you’ve defined exactly what that means for you and how it feels and looks when it’s attained.

So, what does success look like for you? This thought process applies to life as a whole but for the sake of our discussion, let’s just look at what this means for your career:

* How much revenue does your company/division need to earn?
* How much income do you personally want to earn?
* How do you want to divide your time in the typical year, month, week, and day?
* How do you want to be perceived? What image do you want to project?
* What impact do you want to have on your industry?

The answers to these questions are key in determining what “success” means to you and how you should approach your goals.

Keep your definition of success visible and review it often. Remember, you can’t be what you can’t see.

The post Rewriting the Definition of Success appeared first on Lisa Nicole Bell.

When challenges come up and things don’t go as planned, it’s easy to start repeating old stories and lines.

“I’ll never achieve my goals.”

“Things never go the right way for me.”

“Building this company/film/project is too hard.”

The problem with this kind of self-talk is that it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy really fast. We say something to ourselves, we hear it, we believe it, we become it, we live it. Wash, rinse, repeat.

But another interesting thing happens: Other people believe what we say about ourselves.

I recently had a great conversation with Jareau Wade, one of the co-founders of Balanced Payments. Our conversation started about business and his company’s goals and evolved into a discussion about press – how to get it and what to do with it. Jareau told me about the company’s process of working with the press and how it had impacted the company. He said something profound that I jotted down:

“People believe whatever you say about yourself.”

Yeah, they do. What choice do they have? You’re assumed to be an expert on you. If you say you’re a smart, capable person who is doing work that matters, people will believe that. If you say that you’re a company that’s changing the payments landscape for publishers, people will believe that.

We hear the motivational speakers and life coaches implore us to use “positive self talk” and this is why. What you say to yourself and about yourself matters. Choose your words carefully and use them judiciously.

The words matter.

The post The Power of the Spoken Word appeared first on Lisa Nicole Bell.